How to Fight Your Fear with Prayer {Fierce Friday}

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I am so honored today to bring you Rachel Britton. I love Rachel’s blog because she is so very wise. And, she’s Brittish! I love her story of how she fought fear with prayer..it’s something we all need to do!

Fear.

My doctor seemed to hesitate, before pressing on the area again. Fear kept me from saying anything. When he moved on I breathed a sigh of relief. The lump I’d felt must be nothing.

Yet, I didn’t feel at peace about it.

A few months later, I sat on my bed chatting to my sister-in-law on the phone.

“I’m not sure if I’ve got a lump in my breast,” I said. “Go and get it checked immediately,” she replied.

So I did.

Fight your fear with prayer!

I called my doctor first thing on the Monday morning. He sent me for a mammogram the next day.

“I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about,” I told my husband about to fly across the country to California. “You go on your business trip.”

So as I slipped my arm back into the hospital gown after the technologist had finished taking pictures, I wasn’t too worried. So far, everything seemed routine.

Then she came back. “We’re going to do an ultrasound,” she explained, “down the corridor to the left.”

I clutched my clothes tightly to my chest as I walked into a waiting room crowded with men and women, trying not to feel self conscious about my half-naked body under the gown.

As I lay on the bed in the small room and wiped the gel off my skin with a towel, waiting for the doctor.

The only words I heard her say, as she sat down beside me, were: “no biopsy, you must have surgery straightaway.”

Tears welled up in my eyes. “I need to call my husband,” I said, my voice shaking. Yet when I heard him speak, I couldn’t get any words out. “Can you tell him,” I sobbed, handing the phone to the doctor.

In the sanctuary of my car, I broke down.

I let tears flow as shock from the news and fear of the unknown covered me like a cold blanket.

I had cancer. What kind of surgery would I need? How long would I have to live? Who would care for my three children?

I felt so alone. My husband was 3,000 miles away to the west and my family was 3,000 miles in the opposite direction across the Atlantic in England.

Yet, I had a spiritual family who could help me.

When I got home, I called my pastor and asked her to pray for me, along with the women’s prayer team.

When we feel unable to fight for ourselves, we need other people to be strong for us.

And, I had a Heavenly Father.

Fight your fear with PRAYER! Here's how>>#fierceFriday #fiercelyHis Click To Tweet

How to fight fear with prayer.

I had learned to spend time with him during the mundane moments. I regularly went to the track in my town to walk and talk with God. It had been a habit for a long time.

So, it was natural to turn to him in a crisis and believe He was still by my side.

We need to put down roots when the sun shines so we can stand when the storms come. It’s easier then.

Not that I now found it easy to endure or to pray eloquently, but I tried.

Throughout my treatment, I kept up the practice of going to the track when I could.

When butterflies agitated my stomach because of another hospital visit, I’d walk and whisper to God: “I’m scared.”

Fight your fear with prayer!

When worry was my constant companion, during those early weeks of multiple biopsies, I’d remember scripture promises if we pray our anxiety will be replaced by peace.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

When I heard the birds chirping cheerfully in the bushes beside the track, I’d be reminded: Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? (Matthew 6:26-27) Although this thought had difficulty finding its way from my head to my heart.

When my breathing and footfalls were heavy, I’d think about how Jesus prayed when He was burdened. His anguish poured out like drops of blood to the ground.

When my anxiety did not subside, I realized Jesus experienced the same. When He was deeply distressed and troubled, He returned to prayer three times.

It’s comforting to know that in His humanness, Jesus experienced the same anxiety and fear as we do.

In His humanness, Jesus experienced the same anxiety and fear as we do. #fierceFriday #fiercelyHis Click To Tweet

When I thought about family, friends, and people at my church—even those I didn’t know well—who had surged into action and poured out prayers I could not express, I recalled how Jesus wanted his friends to pray, but they fell asleep.

So, like Jesus, I fought my fear by channeling my despair into prayer. I invite you to do the same.

Rachel is a British-born writer and speaker. She is passionate about helping women know their true worth so they can live boldly. Raised on the east coast of England, she now lives in New England with her husband. They have three college-aged children. Rachel cannot live without English tea and chocolate. She has been cancer-free for four years.  You can connect with Rachel at rachelbritton.com, on Facebook and Twitter and Instagram 

Got a #fierceFriday story to share? I’d love to hear it!

I love hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below.

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

To the girl struggling to see her self-worth {FREE DOWNLOAD}

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I was voluntarily trapped inside the shame box, hiding and hoping that no one would find me. Self-worth was something completely void in my life. I wasn’t good. I was unworthy; unlovable. Being inside the shame box felt safe but when the lid was opened, my sins were exposed; out in the open for the world to see.

I walked towards the restaurant, every step feeling like I was wading through quick sand. My husband opened the door for me as he always does, but I motioned for him to go ahead of me. Wanting to hide, I walked behind him through the foyer into the crowded and busy restaurant. Immediately I felt heads turning in judgement. I heard voices saying, “She’s the one!”, “Get her out of here!” “I don’t want her near me!” I hung my head in shame wondering why in the world I had agreed to go out to eat. Every deserved dart came at me, threatening to cripple me.

Every where I went I felt the same struggles; walking through Target, strolling the mall, shopping for groceries. Every one there was throwing insults my way; telling me that I was no good; questioning the kind of mother I was; wondering how my husband was still married to me.

Although the shame box was safe, I needed out.

Every day I had to physically force myself to be some kind of normal. I had to physically drag myself out of bed and help my daughters get ready for school. I didn’t have a choice.

Every day I had to fight.

I tried opening my bible but it felt like I was reading a book that was written in a foreign language. At the time, I didn’t have the strength to re-learn it and I didn’t feel I was worthy, anyway.

That was a long time ago, and I’m happy to say things have changed dramatically for me. Although there are times when shame tries to creep back in, I am happy and whole. I know my worth. I know my value. And I know I am loved.

To the Girl struggling to see her self-worth -God sees you!

 

To the girl struggling to see her self-worth:

I get you girl, and you aren’t alone.

Because of past mistakes or past hurts, you can’t seem to get one foot in front of the other; and when you do, you’re dragging.

Oh how I get you.

I know how it feels to stand in front of the mirror, not being able to put your foundation on because of the tears running down your face.

I know.

Self-worth: The Fight.

Please listen to me: There is something out there that wants to literally destroy you and me. He slivers around inside our heads and shouts profanities at us. He hates us and everything about us. He is fighting to bring us down. And it isn’t a petty little playground fight. This is legit. This is the fight of all fights. 

The fight for your selfworth isnt a petty little playground fight-it's legit, & can destroy… Click To Tweet

Can I be a little (alot) bit bold with you?

How dare we allow this to happen?! Right? How dare we allow something like this to grab hold of us and tell us who we are and who we are not.

I mean, we are daughters of the most high King for goodness sakes!? Put those gloves on girl, and fight!

We have a heavenly Father who is so in love with us that He gave His Son as a sacrifice so that you and I would never have to feel this way!

God made YOU. He FORMED you while you were in your momma’s belly. You were made in HIS image. So, just knowing this alone means that our worth is not in ourselves but in God, because He made us!

“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:14

And here lies the issue: knowing it and believing it are two very different things. So, how do we BELIEVE? How do we believe and know that we have worth; that we are worthy?

It’s an every day fight. We have to fight to know and believe it because the devil is going to do everything he can to bring us down. So let’s punch him in the face! Wanna?

He (Satan) is fighting and we MUST FIGHT BACK. Ephesians 6:10-18

Self-worth: The Lies vs The Truth.

I’m sure you’re a great momma and wife, but that isn’t where your worth is found.
Whether you get 123 likes or 4 likes on your latest Facebook picture that isn’t where your worth is found.
Whether you’re a teacher, musician or politician, that’s not where your worth is found.

Your worth is found in Jesus Christ and Jesus Christ alone. Period.

To the Girl struggling to see her self-worth -God sees you!

Self-worth: Gold and Silver.

You’re valuable! So valuable that you were worth God sacrificing His only Son. And he may be the only person that will ever really and truly love you unconditionally. Let this truth-bomb soak in; because when it does, it will be the only opinion that really matters.

God is the only person that will ever really love you unconditionally. #selfworth #fiercelyHis Click To Tweet

You are loved, girl! You are valuable! You are worthy! Now, lift that head up. As I always say to my girls: chin up, buttercup.

Several weeks ago I offered you a #SheIsFierce Fighter Journal for when you need to fight for your marriage, and this week I’m offering another one!

To the Girl struggling to see her self-worth -God sees you!#SheIsFierce Fighter Journal/Fighting to Know Your Self-worth

In this journal you will find 6 steps to knowing your self-worth with 6 truths and 6 actions steps. And an added bonus with 24 verses for when you need a self-worth boost!

And how can you get this journal??

I’m so glad you asked! It’s easy- all you have to do is join the #fiercelyHis community!

I love hearing from you! Honestly it makes me giddy. (no lie)Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

You might also enjoy:

 

 

From Pain to Promise {Fierce Friday}

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I’m thrilled to have my friend Regan Frizzelle share her powerful story with us today, and how God did not waste her pain! Regan is proof that no matter what our past looks like, there is always hope for us!

Pain to Promise

I remember the day that Jesus invaded my life so well.

I came home from school instead of going to my Mom’s nail salon. She worked 14 hours a day in order to put food on the table for the four of us. She was on her 5th marriage to a man who was a mirror to her. She treated all the men before, the way he was treating her now; manipulative and mean. And it was a wake-up call for her about who she had become.

My mom drank to go to sleep and she drank to wake up. She kept a little pink glass at her nail station at all times that was full of Wild Turkey or Tequila.

When I got home from school one day the phone rang. It was one of my Mom’s clients. She was super anxious  and asked if I had gone to see my Mom at her shop; which I told her, no. She urged me to head to her shop because she had received an alarming call from my mom saying, “goodbye.”

When I got there, the doors were locked. This was rare, because my Mom always said, “we can’t make money if my doors are shut.” She was always working.

I peaked through the huge glass window in the front. She wasn’t at her desk. All I could see was a note. The words written on that little note were devastating.

Dear Mark,

I’m so sorry that I’m not enough for you. I can’t seem to make you happy.
Kids, I love you so much. Please forgive me.

Love, Mom

From Pain to Promise- God will never waste our pain!I took a step back from the glass window and thought to myself, “What is going on? My mom does not give up?!”

The police arrived and busted the door open. I rushed in front of the officer, not knowing what I was going to find. I was screaming and crying so hard with a mixture of emotions from hurt to anger. When I found her she was sitting cross-legged; beside her an almost empty bottle of Wild Turkey and a gun. She was conscious, but because of all she drank she was totally unaware.

My mom’s pain had taken her to the rock bottom and I felt like I was right there with her.

The ambulance came and took her to the psychiatric ward while I stayed behind to close up her shop.

Destiny Changed.

God stepped into the cold psychiatric ward that night. A doctor came in, rolled up in his chair knee to knee with my intoxicated Mom and gave her hope. He said, “You know I don’t think you are a bad lady at all. I don’t think you want to hurt yourself. I think you need hope. Do you have a church or a Bible?”

This changed the course of all our lives.

Just hours later they released her. She met a Pastor who gave her a bible in the middle of a parking lot and prayed with her. 

I was at my Grandparents for a couple of weeks because I wasn’t sure I wanted to come home. When I did, my Mom greeted me with a hug at the door. We sat down and she told me how she wanted to read the Bible and go to church. I love my mom and was always so close with her. I laid on her shoulder and just cried. She had a hope that I wanted and I could see change in her eyes. Something was so different!

These next few months my mom devoured the word of God. She began to transform right before our very eyes. My life has never been the same.

Oh, we tried to find the Doctor from the Psychiatric ward years later and there was no record of him having ever worked there. We think he was our angel!

Hope Renewed.

From Pain to Promise- God will never waste our pain!

 

My Mom’s transformation was radical. She quit drinking almost immediately and began to pray for each of her kids.

When I caught hold of hope in Jesus, I never looked back. I went to Bible school and met my husband Aaron. We have been in ministry almost 17 years together. 15 of those years I spent reaching students in Lawton, and Tulsa, Ok. Working with students was an honor for me because I got to give them hope; which is something I never had. 

Jeanne Mayo, a mentor of mine says, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.-Jeannie Mayo #fierceFriday Click To Tweet

The students that we spent years reaching only wanted to be loved, seen and heard. God was the one who changed their behavior. Our goal was to just love consistently. I think of serving the local church as my opportunity and not my obligation. I know the desperation of extreme hopelessness and my mandate is to make my pain pay me back through the investment of others. I want to see those that are lost, found; just as I was.

I pray that no matter how hard your road is or has been that you would know and understand your value. Value is not something we are all born with. It is invested and sought after and most of all it’s placed.

Your greatest tool to fight in life could very well be your JOY!

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex. Psalm 139:13 (NLT)

The Lord is my strength and my song; He has given me victory. Psalm 118:14

Regan is a fighter and she is #fiercelyHis

Regan serves alongside her husband at Hope Fellowship, in Frisco Tx. She has three kids; Jaxon, Jada, and Ivy. She enjoys serving the church in every way. Regan loves to share her story and gift of comedy to bring encouragement and make people laugh. She wants to give people the permission to relax and not take everything so serious. 

I always enjoy hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

You might also enjoy:

When Gods Plan Exceeds our Dreams

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Sometimes our dreams aren’t His plans. I’m so excited to have Ally as a guest today! Ally is just a down-to-earth girl who isn’t afraid to follow God’s leading. She’s bold. She’s courageous.  And I admire her! 

I pull the door shut and lock it, feeling the now-familiar clink of the bolt finding its mark. The faint smell of marijuana thanks to the other tenants of the building our company rents- lingers despite the pine scented candles I have burning all the time.

Covering each candle, I extinguish their small flames before turning off the lights, locking the cash drawer. I check the time on my phone, and look past those digital numbers, focusing on a picture of my home… some 800 miles and two more months away.

We can close our fists around our dreams and plans and to surrender them to the One who knows everything. Or, we can keep our hands open, palms up, waiting for the adventure He has in store.
An unexpected life.

I really never expected a life like this one.

Let’s be honest- we all have expectations for how our lives are going to go. Those expectations can be casual assumptions, wild fantasies, things we’ve planned and worked toward. Sometimes, those expectations are met… sometimes not.

My life reads like a series of expectation obituaries. Most of my plans, most of the things I just assumed would be part of my life, all those expectations have died.

Killed by reality.

I could list them all for you, all the things I never expected- a nomadic lifestyle of six months in one place, six in another; this job that chose me; infertility stealing my dreams of a big family; more.

So many more.

We’ve all got our lists of the unexpected. You have one, too.

But the list of unmet expectations matters much less than what we do with that list.

See, I’m learning that it’s so easy for me to hold up my unexpected life to God in anger.

It’s so easy.

Expectations are tricky that way.

Especially on days when I’m overwhelmed, when I grieve, when I’m tired or hungry, it’s so easy to allow my expectations to harden our hearts. I do it all the time. I wanted my life to look a certain way, and it doesn’t, and so I’m inclined to believe that God is withholding and I shake my fists at Him.

Sometimes our dreams aren't His plans. #fiercelyHis #fierceFriday Click To Tweet

I lift up my hands full of complaints and grumbling and ask, How is this better than my plans? and Why is this what You’ve given me? and sometimes, Why can’t I have a life like hers?

But there’s another way.

It’s harder.

It’s a fight.

And in the end, He wins.

I pry my fingers loose one by one, open palms, open heart. I hold my hands open to receive what’s given, not what’s expected.

Open palms, open heart.

And I remember that contentment is a struggle and retraining my mind to the truths of God’s goodness to me is a process, slow and painstaking. I can give in to the sore spots of the way I thought it should be rather than the way it is. I can give in to the whispers of the evil one telling me who I am.

Or I can keep trying.

You can let discontent cloud your vision & make life miserable or you can keep trying.… Click To Tweet

I’m trying to keep asking, What do You have for me here?

Because ultimately, my life is like dust the wind blows away, and what He has ordained lasts forever.

So what does He have for me here?

For some of my unexpected life, there are answers.

My high-school-self had life turned upside down when my family moved, but I met my husband there.

This crazy job (at a snowmobile touring company, of all things) is the last place I expected to be, but here I am, breathing a small bit of Life into these scruffy young men and showing them a small taste of God’s love.

For some of my life, there are no answers to the questions; yet.

But I can do one of two things- I get the choice. I can close my fists around my dreams and my plans and refuse- refuse to surrender them to the One who knows everything.

Or, I can keep my hands open, palms up, waiting for the adventure He has in store for me.

Ally Vermeer is an accidental country girl who splits her time between the cornfields of Iowa and the snowy mountain passes of Colorado. She strives to find beauty in the everyday, find God’s gifts in the unexpected, and find her phone (where’d she leave it this time?). Ally writes about faith, her family, her farmhouse, and counts her blessings (even the speckled ones) at The Speckled Goat. You can also connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheSpeckledGoat/

Blog: http://thespeckledgoatblog.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/thespkldgoat

See what I mean? Isn’t she admirable? I applaud you Ally, for following His leading even when it feels uncomfortable!

Ally is a fighter. And she is #fiercelyHis

I always enjoy hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts about Ally’s story below. Can you relate? 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

You might also enjoy these related articles:

How I Learned to Fiercely Trust During a Time of Doubt {Fierce Friday}

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I’m so excted to have Natalie as a guest today! I know you’ll fall in love with her just as I did several months ago. Natalie has such wisdom and I’m honored to know her! Her Momma’s heart in this story shines through. Enjoy!

Thanksgiving of 2016 is one that I’ll remember for the rest of my life.  It’s the day that our “normal” was forever changed…

Life Altered.

I remember that as I sat next to my son in the dark, all I could hear was the bleep of the heart monitor.  The overwhelming concern I felt was sending chills down my spine.  My nineteen year old son Alex lay sleeping in the hospital bed with his body in a weakened and fragile state.

I watched as he breathed in and out, wondering how did we get here?  How was it that my son (who was young and healthy) ended up in the Intensive Care Unit on Thanksgiving Day? 

Was he going to pull through?

I prayed.  I prayed hard about the unknown that was set before us.

The Diagnosis.

My son was suffering from Ketoacidosis which causes the body to accumulate keto acids in the blood.  It was something that could have been fatal had we not taken him to the Emergency Room.  As the lab results started coming in Alex was officially diagnosed as a Type 1 diabetic.

This floored me.

First off, I had no idea what the difference between a Type 1 and Type 2 diabetic was.  I was under the preconceived notion that they were both conditions that occurred when someone was consuming too much sugar.

Not true.

I was informed that my son had a pancreas that produced either very little or no insulin at all.  He was now going to be insulin dependent for the rest of his life.  I slowly began to realize that his life was no longer in danger, but that this wasn’t something that was just going to go away. 

He was receiving a life sentence. 

I was assured that this would be the first of many visits to the ICU and that blindness and limb amputation were a reality he’d might one day have to face.

As I sat going over the flood of information I was receiving, my flesh wanted to cry out and ask God why He had added this onto my already toppling pile of burdens.

My heart already knew why. 

All this was actually an answer to my prayers.

A Hard Year.

2016 had been a particularly rough year.  It seemed almost like our family had been getting hit from the right and the left.  Our children had been giving us a hard time by testing their boundaries and doing what teenagers do.

Us being slammed with a hospital visit on a holiday fit right in with the vibe of recent circumstances.

The most challenging of my two kids throughout the year had definitely been my son.  The nicest way I could put the amount of pain and destruction he was causing is by comparing him to the prodigal son.

I had been spending countless days and night in prayer that my son would give his heart to Jesus.  That he would live a life for Him and stop buying into the lie that this world has something more to offer.  The more I prayed, it seemed like the further away he got.

That’s when my prayers turned desperate and tearful.

“Give him a wake up call God.  Make him live a life for you and realize that there is nothing else out there that compares to you.  Rattle him Lord.  I pray that he no longer gets pleasure from his bad choices but that they actually make him sick.”

God hears our fierce prayers, and answers them as He sees fit.God hears our #fierce prayers! #fiercelyHis #fierce trust @milkandhoneyfth Click To Tweet

His way, not my way.

Jesus and the ICU.

Just like that, Jesus had reminded me how He was in the midst of it all and overwhelming peace flooded my heart.

I felt some guilt, but mostly peace because I knew that God was using this to move my son’s heart toward him.  It was necessary.

My fear of a new medical diagnosis was then trumped by the comfort of an all-knowing God.  His sovereign will took over and I was going to let it. 

Extreme doubt was replaced by fierce trust. 

How I learned to fiercely trust God during a season of extreme doubt.

I was trusting to leave the unknown up to our God whose master plan was bigger than I could even conceive of.

For truly, God loves my son even more than I do.

We prayed healing over my son.  We thanked the Lord for giving Him a chance.  We thanked God for saving his life.  That room in the ICU was flooded with praise.

I found myself being so grateful that we live in a day in age where the medical field is as advanced as it is.  Had this been a hundred years ago, my son wouldn’t have survived.

I thanked God that this happened while my son was still living in my home and was covered under my insurance.

A situation that started off as sinister was turning into a reason for praise!

That is only possible with a God as good as ours.

He is Trustworthy.

I learned that in life’s bleakest moments God still shines through. God's promise of being the Rock we can stand on is there for the taking. @milkandhoneyfth… Click To TweetYet, some of us still choose the shifting sand.  He taught me that I could lean on Him and that He would sustain me during whatever life would throw at me.  Up until then, nothing had been life threatening but He showed me that sooner or later those moments show up for us all.

Who will you trust?

Who can we trust?

Him.

Our Savior Jesus Christ.

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. James 1: 2-3

How I learned to fiercely trust God during a season of extreme doubt.Natalie Venegas is a Christian creative and California native that now resides in Las Vegas, NV.  Her passion is community and her heart is for the Lord.  When she isn’t writing for Milk & Honey Faith she can be found spending quality time with her husband Anthony and her two children.  Natalie also serves alongside her Husband in ministry in the hopes of reaching many with the Gospel of Jesus and furthering His Kingdom. You can also connect with Natalie 

https://www.pinterest.com/milkandhoneyfth/

https://twitter.com/milkandhoneyfth

https://www.instagram.com/milkandhoneyfaith/

Natalie is a fighter, and she is #fiercelyHis

I love hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts about Natalie’s story below. Also, if you have a story you’d like to share, click here for more info.

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

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Fight for your Marriage + FREE download

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These four little words from my Dad were some of the most life-altering words for me several years ago. Shannon, you have to fight for your marriage. I knew he was right. I knew that I needed to fight…and I’m so glad I did!  Marriage can be one of the most beautiful relationships you’ll have, but it is one of the hardest to maintain.

Because it isn’t easy.

Marriage is hard.

You will have trials, you’ll have days when you wonder what in the world what you were thinking when you said “I do.”

There will even be days when you’ll want to give up. I’ve been there.

I don’t know what you’re going through in your marriage right now, but I do know one thing:

Jesus can heal your marriage.

I know this because He healed mine. My marriage was struck a traumatizing blow yet we survived. Not only did we survive, we thrive today. But only because of Jesus.

And I can assure you that Jesus knows EXACTLY what you’re going through. He’s right there even when you do not feel Him.

Whether it is infidelity, financial burdens, estranged children, work stress, family relationships, or whatever it is…I encourage you to FIGHT.

Fight for your marriage.

My marriage was in shambles and devastation was literally at every corner. There was no way that we would make it. The trauma was too much, and it seemed impossible to recover. My husband had every right to seek divorce, yet he chose not to take that route. I repented and asked for forgiveness.

My husband gave me forgiveness and much more grace than I deserved and I’m so grateful he chose to FIGHT for our marriage.

And, I’m so grateful that I chose to FIGHT because honestly, sometimes it would have been easier for both of us to just give up!

After several years of restoration, my marriage is healthy, whole and complete, but only because we BOTH chose to fight.

#FiercelyHis Community

I get several emails each week from people who are desperately seeking answers for their own marriage.

So, I’m excited to offer this free #SheIsFierce Fighter Journal.

Grab your free #SheIsFierce Fighter Journal on fighting for your marriage!

My hope is that you will download it, print it out and use it as a source to help you fight for your marriage.

My hope is that you will partner with Jesus.

My hope is that you realize that your marriage can not survive without Him.

My hope is that it will draw you closer to Him. And that you realize your need of Him in your life.

And lastly, my hope is that you join the #fiercelyHis community, if you haven’t already done so.

The #fiercelyHis community is made up of every day women. Together we are fiercely His. We realize we are nothing without Him. We realize that He loves us so fiercely that He died for us. He died a painful and brutal death. {1 Peter 2:24} THAT’S how much He loves us. His love is unconditional and NOTHING can separate it from us. {Romans 8:38} He is in constant pursuit of us. {Ezekial 34:11} Therefore not only are we His,…we are fiercely His.

Would you join us?  If so, click here. You will receive an email with the information you need to download your FREE fighter journal. I’m SO excited about this community.

And don’t worry, this community isn’t only for those that are married…or those that are struggling in their marriage…it’s for everyone as I am in the process of rolling out other journals that everyone can benefit from!

I want to hear from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

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How to fight when words hurt {Fierce Friday}

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Oh friends, I hope your kleenex is handy. Here is my friend Jerusha. She has a story for you. I fell in with love Jerusha’s heart very quickly. She is a warrior. I’ve decided I want to be just like her when I grow up. Lean in- just make sure you have your kleenex.

How to Fight when Words Hurt

Once upon a time I dreamed of being a figure skater. I imagined gliding over the ice on perfectly white skates, twirling and jumping in perfection. During the winter months I was glued to the television, watching athletes masterfully dance across the ice. It looked so glamorous. And don’t even get me started on the outfits. Glitter? Yes, please.

Sometimes dreams die. My figure skating dream died the day I was skating on a canal behind my elementary school and I twisted my ankle. I fell flat on my face and when I hit the ice, I realized I didn’t have the skills or the grace to make that dream a reality.

While I wasn’t to broken up over the death of that dream, I have had others die that have been harder to process. Little did I know not being able to figure skate was going to be the least of my worries – and that not being able to walk was going to be one of the worst.

Recently I was diagnosed with an untreatable disease called Lipedema. While this disease comes with a significant amount of pain, it also comes with disfigurement and loss of mobility. Essentially, Lipedema is a fat disorder that allows excess fat on your limbs, excluding your extremities. In short, it is just all around ugly. Living with the pain that goes along with this disease is not easy, but far worse is living life in our world as a “super sized” woman.

The good news? I never had dreams of being a super model. I could handle not being able to wear the latest fashions, but I still had to let go of some dreams I didn’t want to have to abandon.

One of the hardest dreams I have had to let go of is being just like everyone else.

To let go of my independence in my 30s instead of my 80s.

Can I be honest here?

I needed to let go of the ability to do the little things like putting on my own socks. And the harder things, like going on family hikes. (I am not sure that was ever a “dream” of mine, but I do want to spend time with my kids – and if it that means going on hikes, I wanted to be the kind of Mom that could lace up her boots and join in). Instead, I have had to sit out on a lot of activities with my family, because I can’t walk well, and when I do walk I am painfully slow.

How to fight when words hurt | Fierce Friday- the battle you are fighting has already been won!

But let’s just pause for a minute – because we need to remember this – we are in a spiritual battle.

My battle and your battle might look very different, but they are the same.

We are never guaranteed an easy life, so when troubles come like the inevitably will, we need to choose to fight. The devil will try to take a foothold in our lives and cause us to stumble.

We are never guaranteed an easy life, so when troubles come we need to choose to fight.… Click To Tweet

I need to be honest here and let you know that I am so far from a perfect warrior. I struggle to fight sometimes, and when I struggle to fight there are casualties. My worst wounds come when I choose to let the comments of people who do not know me slice deep into my heart. People who see my body but do not see my heart.

I may have physical imperfections, but far worse are the battle scars my heart has endured.

But here’s the thing – we don’t need to fight this fight alone. Yes, sometimes we have to let go of our dreams, but only because God’s plans are bigger. Surrendering our dreams to live out God’s plan for our lives can be difficult because sometimes we are walking in blind. We don’t know what He has in store for us. We don’t know that plan is. So we just wait.

And while we wait, we fight our battles.

When the blows strike, as they often do, I remember God is good to me.

I remember I am His. 

Fiercely His

When blows strike, remember God is still good. #fierceFriday #fiercelyhis Click To Tweet

It isn’t always easy to let the words fall around me without injuring me, but you and I have the greatest armor ever. Let’s quickly remember this together.

The Helmet of Salvation – When we believe Christ died for our sins and are part of God’s family, we all wear this.

The Breastplate of Righteousness – This is basically the breastplate of grace. When others hurt us, it means being honest, and good and fair. When others are hurting, it means standing with them and standing up for them.

The Shield of Faith – Our protection for when we are tempted to doubt. Remembering that God WILL keep His promises.

The Belt of Truth – This helps us to keep our hearts and lives in line with God’s will and plan for our lives, even when it means going against everything that makes sense to the world.

The Sword of the Spirit – Our biggest, and our strongest weapon against anything the battle throws at us. The Bible, God’s truth. Read it. Memorize it. Use it, friends.

Feet prepared with the Gospel of Peace – Ahh, here it is. This is what is means to be content in all circumstances and to have peace regardless of what the battle brings.

Oh, friends. It is when I am at my worst when I remember my armor. After the words have wounded me. After my heart has been broken. After I feel hopeless, when I feel like I am worthless because the world tells me I am. That’s when I hear that gentle whisper telling me to put my armor on.

See, I already told you I am a lousy warrior – most soldiers put their battle armor on BEFORE the fight. But when I remember, when I hear that gentle whisper, that is when I rise. That is when my spirit soars with the truth that I am His.

That is when I remember that the battle we are fighting has already been won.

Choosing to Fight | Fierce Friday- the battle you are fighting has already been won!

And while I am here, surviving this disease and saying goodbye to dreams, that is when I remember my worth. That is when I the Gospel of Peace slides on to my feet and propels me to keep going. Because the world can’t tell me how and when I matter. Only God can. The world can’t tell me I am ugly, because God tells me I am beautiful.

Only God can tell us how and when we matter. #fiercelyHis #fierceFriday Click To Tweet

So put your armor on with me, friends. Fight with me. The battle is His.

Jerusha lives in Eastern Canada with her husband and two sons. She has wanted to be a writer since she was ten years old. Writing is her therapy, her way of dealing with life. She loves writing about her journey and sharing the love of God with others. She may not be a famous, world-traveling journalist – but she believes she is exactly where God wants her to be, writing exactly what He wants her to write. What a beautiful thing!  

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Jerusha mentioned that she is not the perfect warrior, but I disagree, don’t you? She’s the perfect warrior….she’s a fighter. And she’s fiercely His.

I love hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Do you have a Fierce Friday story? Want to share it? Click here!

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

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How to Love them Deeply

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We were at the Denver airport catching a flight to Tulsa, Ok. I was with my oldest daughter and we had just sat down to eat a quick dinner before we boarded the plane. I looked over to my left and saw an Asian woman sitting by herself eating salad and working on her computer, which was a Mac by the way.  She looked to be around 60, wore glasses and her hair reminded me of June Cleaver. I wondered what she could be working on and where she was headed. I found myself caught up in imagination as I tried to figure her out in my mind. I looked her way several times, hoping that she would glance back. She finally did. I smiled and she smiled back and we exchanged a genuine care for each other like human beings should. I wondered if there was anything that we had in common. I didn’t know. I only knew this one thing.

I loved her.

To my right were two men, one had an accent like mine, except not as southern, and another had one that was European. They were laughing with each other and talking about future plans. It seemed as though they were going their own separate ways. I couldn’t help but smile at them as they gathered their things to leave.

I loved them.

We’re living in an odd time, aren’t we? It seems the word “love” is being thrown around very genuinely, and also very carelessly. I see people shouting LOVE in so many ways. Some ways that are good, and honestly some ways that are nauseating. I see people shout love but out of hate. Kind of ironic, isn’t it?

I have seen relationships literally torn in two because of different political and religious beliefs. Judgements are tossed around like rag-dolls without care or concern.

I just don’t get it?

My uncomplicated and naive heart just doesn’t get it.

I wrote a post not too long ago about loving yourself.  I honestly believe that at the core of all of the hate in the people of America is a lack of love and acceptance for who they are. Seems to be a pretty simple conclusion and I’m certain there is more to it but for the sake of time I’ll just leave it at that. I encourage you just to think on that and draw your own conclusion.

Love each other deeply, because love makes up for practically anything –  1 Peter 4:8

Notice anything about that verse?

Practically anything. 

The ones that are near and dear to our hearts are not the only ones who deserve our deep love.

The ones that are near & dear to our hearts aren't the only ones who deserve our deep love. Click To Tweet

I’ll be honest- it’s hard to even love some, much less love them deeply?!

It’s one thing to love another person, but it’s a completely different thing to love them deeply.

And speaking of practically anything, I have a lot of “practically anything’s,” don’t you? Here are some of mine:
I love you deeply, and that makes up for the fact that we don’t see eye to eye politically.
I love you deeply, and that makes up for the fact that you cut me off in traffic.
I… that we don’t worship the same God.
I… that you pushed me out of your life.
I… that I feel like you spread hate on face-book.
I… that makes up for the fact that you hurt people who I love.

What are your practically anything’s?

I love you deeply, and that makes up for the fact that _________________________.
(What could you insert here?)

How to love them deeply. Everyone carries with them a story of love, heartbreak and history. Everyone deserves our deep love, because love makes up for anything.

 

  • Deep love is unconditional. It means you love someone regardless of their weaknesses. And you don’t complain about it. It means that you love them and don’t want anything in return. You love them in spite of. So look beyond the weakness. We shouldn’t have to apply for love from another human being as if we’re trying to get a job at McDonald’s, but isn’t that what it’s come to these days? Good grief. Love them for them, not for what they do or don’t do! Love is a gift that you give another.
  • Open your mind and heart. Look past all of the ways that you’re different and listen to them. Listen to their stories and be willing to share your stories. You probably have more in common than you think. Every one has endured a heart-break of some kind. That alone is a commonality.
  • Practice empathy. For some this is just a gift, for others not so much. Empathy is simply putting yourself in another’s shoes. Do you have any idea what they have gone through in their life? Do you have any idea what they went through this morning? I love this quote- Be kind, for everyone is facing a battle that you do not know about. Every body carries with them a story. A story of love, heart-break and history that make them who they are.
Everyone carries a story of love, heartbreak &history that make them who they are. Click To Tweet

How to love them deeply. Everyone carries with them a story of love, heartbreak and history. Everyone deserves our deep love, because love makes up for anything.

Love them deeply.

Next time you have the opportunity, intentionally look a stranger in the eye. Make eye contact and give a genuine heart-felt smile. You would be amazed at what it could do for their day, as well as yours.

 

I love hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

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How a Broken Engagement made me Fiercely His

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I’m so honored today to bring you my new friend Brittany! Oh you guys. Lean in. When I initially read her words I got chills. She’s got a word for you, I promise!

a broken engagement

I awoke to a splitting head ache and swollen eyes. I laid in my bed, vacant of any strength to do more than stare at the door. Pain flooded my heart as I remembered the occurrences of the previous night.

Brokenness had welcomed itself into my life once again. This time, in the form of a white dress returned, and a promise withdrawn.

And the pain cut so deep, I had little will to live.

But through the crippling heartache, God gave me the strength to get up and go to work. Numerous times throughout the day I asked myself “How am I doing this?” as I smiled and assisted customers. I can’t find the words to help you understand what happened that day. All I know is I am 100% certain that the Lord himself carried me through. I didn’t muster the strength up, and he didn’t just give me a push.

His grace poured over me like a wave that carried me to shore.

broken engagement1

Through heartbreak, His grace will pour over us like a wave to the shore. #fiercelyHis Click To Tweet

Since 16, I had never been the single girl. Always trying to fill the void, I’d jump into a new relationship almost immediately. But now, I was a new Christian and I knew those days were behind me. What I didn’t know was how to be alone, nor could I stand the thought of it. I believed I needed a man in order to be happy or to feel I had any worth.

Maybe you believe that too. Please read on, I have a beautiful truth for you, friend.

a broken engagement: revealed

Over the course of about 2 1/2 years, the Lord took me on a journey of deep healing. Healing I didn’t even know I needed.

When God allows something painful in your life, you can be sure he will use it to sanctify you and grow you closer to him.

When God allows something painful in your life, he will use it to grow you closer to him.… Click To Tweet

You see, I had a much deeper issue in my heart than just the wounds caused by this broken engagement. Hidden under the surface was the infection which was the real cause of my pain. God was not sitting on the throne of my heart, my ex fiance was.

There was a war for my heart and God was jealous over my attention.

For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God. (Deuteronomy 4:24 ESV)

For years, I was blinded to the fact that I idolized men. I worshiped how they made me feel, the attention they gave me, and the comfort they sometimes provided. This is why I found myself walking the road of promiscuity. Because it was there that I found all that my sinful heart craved. I was a broken girl who often felt rejected by my Father so I searched for acceptance by sacrificing my purity on the altar of boys.

But with this break-up, the veil began to lift. As the texts, calls and pop-ups at my apartment flooded in with temptations to take him back, clarity had already taken root and God had broken the chains of this idol which I had clung so tightly to before.

I still, to this day, praise the Lord for ripping that man from my arms!

Though I felt tremendous pain for many months, it was the best thing that could have ever happened. Our Lord always knows best. We can trust him in every circumstance.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV)

Clearing my heart of this idol was a process. There was pressing temptation to fall into old sin. There was deep sorrow as I watched the man who broke me, marry before me. There were nights of crying alone on my bed praying (or screaming, rather) these words, “Please bring me a husband. I’m so lonely. My heart hurts so bad.”

God was faithful through it all to remind me what I needed was not a husband, but himself instead. He is the only one who can mend a broken heart (Psalm 147:3) and truly satisfy and provide for our every need.

God is the ONLY one who can truly satisfy our every need! @godsmyhealer #fiercelyHis Click To Tweet

broken engagement

a broken engagement: contentment

Did you know contentment is possible? That’s really what Paul is talking about when he says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!”

We can be content in singleness, heart-break, financial problems or anything we’re battling.

There was a point after years of singleness when contentment finally rested upon my heart. I had no prospects and I was content, even happy.

Remember what I said about not believing I could be happy without a man in my life? Well, here is proof of the miraculous work only God can do in the heart of a broken woman.

My “happy ending” was not that I found a husband. My “happy ending” was finding everything I needed in Christ and Christ alone. He became my souls greatest desire and that brought more freedom than I had ever dreamed.

He changed me from a woman who chased fiercely after men, to a woman who is fiercely his.

And he can do the same for you.

How a broken engagement made me fiercely HisMeet Brittany:

Brittany is a follower of Christ and wife to James. She exists to bring God glory and prays that her writing is an avenue for that. Brittany longs to encourage women to think and live biblically and she thrive’s on seeing women open up their hearts to The Savior and to other women around them. She believes transparency is the key to growth and promises to be real, even when it hurts.

Connect with Brittany:
GodsMyHealer Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest

Man oh man! Did Brittany’s words speak to you like they spoke to me? I’d love to hear from you! Please take a minute and share your thoughts below. Has anything ever been stripped away from you? How did you handle it? 

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To the girl who feels rejected and misunderstood.

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To the girl who feels rejected and misunderstood- you still have purpose!

Girl- I feel ya…I really do. And I bet there’s not a girl out there who would say she’s never been rejected or misunderstood. It happens to all of us at one point or another.

I got a call one morning that completely rocked my world. I was dripping wet from the shower I had just taken. The person on the other end and I talked for about 10 minutes…but I hardly heard anything she said after the first couple of minutes, and honestly it’s all a blur now.  After I clicked “end” on my phone, I took my heart-broken, rejected, and jilted body to my bed and slumped down under the covers. I couldn’t believe this was happening.

I was kicked out.
Not wanted.
Misunderstood.
De-valued.

But most of all I was rejected.

And there was not one thing I could do about it.

It was over.

It was one of the worst feelings of my life. Even though I sort of saw it coming, when it actually happened it completely knocked the wind out of me. And it couldn’t have come at the worst possible time. It was the day after my Grandfather died and two days before his funeral.

I don’t want to go into details simply because I whole-heartedly and genuinely want to protect those involved, but it was something that I had a passion for. I was honored to be involved because it was making an impact. It was worthwhile and influential and lives were being changed including my own. But within 10 minutes, just like that, I was out.

I don’t know what you’re going through or why you feel rejected or misunderstood. But I want you to know that it’s going to be okay.

God is on your side

Now hang on, sis. When I say God is on your side, I don’t mean that he has taken sides and has picked yours. No, that’s not what I’m saying. Because you see, God is on everyone’s side..He’s cool like that. He loves every one of us, no matter what. So when I say He was on my side, He was there, picking me up, comforting me, and reassuring me that it was going to be okay.

You still have purpose.

No matter what you’re going through, or what someone else does to you, God has a purpose for you and for your life. He has a plan. At the time I was so devastated by what had happened I was sure there was no longer a purpose for me. I felt like it had been taken away, because I was sure I was in my sweet spot. Ever feel that way? Yeah, it’s a hard thing to go through. It seemed like it took me a really long time to heal and move on, but I did with God’s help. There is a beautiful purpose for you on the other side of rejection…always remember that!

There is a beautiful purpose for you on the other side of rejection. Click To Tweet

You have to forgive.

Forgive those that try to harm you and forgive those that honestly think they’re doing the right thing. But why in the world do we have to forgive others, especially when they have hurt us so much? Let’s be honest. This just sucks, doesn’t it? Sorry girls, life is hard. We have to do the hard things in order for us to grow and develop in to who we’re supposed to be.

I know that the person who rejected me felt she was doing the right thing. I also believe that she felt she was doing what God wanted her to do. This is a hard thing for me to understand. But, the thing is, it’s not for me to understand. Sometimes those that harm us feel they are doing the right thing. Sometimes their heart is in the right place….at least that’s what I believe. It’s what I had to believe.

Speaking of forgiveness, just because you forgive, doesn’t mean the relationship will go back to the way it was. And that’s okay. You have to be okay with that. I carried guilt and confusion with me for a long time because I used to be very close with this person. After everything happened, there was just no way for us go back to the way it was before. The details and circumstances just wouldn’t allow it, and I had to learn that it was okay. I was confused by this because I thought that the only way I would know if I had forgiven her was if we became close friends again. Through the wise counsel of someone who I could trust, I realized this wasn’t the case.

To the girl who's been rejected and misunderstood- you still have purpose!

When someone rejects you and you feel misunderstood I believe there are 5 things you should do to move past it:

Wish them well.

Want good things for them. Pray for them. Forgive them even when you do not understand.

Hope for them.

Believe that they have the best of intentions.

This one is hard I get that and I’ll be honest, I don’t even know how to accurately explain how to do it…I just know it’s important. As I was writing this, it took me what seemed like hours to figure this one out and I just couldn’t. I still can’t. Some things we just don’t get… or maybe it’s just giving the benefit of the doubt. Just believe that they have the best of intentions and move on.

Be teachable.

Have a teachable spirit. Ask God what it is that He wants you to learn. I firmly believe that the things in life we go through can either cripple us to catapult us into a stronger, wiser person if we allow it. Put away your pride and reflect on what you could have done differently. You will be wiser for it.

Let go.

Let go of wanting to be understood. Quit fretting and stewing over it because honestly it’s not worth it.

HELLO. This is the worst, because really, we all just want to be understood. Especially those of us that may have a hard time communicating our feelings.

We.just.want.to.be.understood.

I went over and over in my mind what happened and how I should have or could have responded differently. I felt overwhelmingly misunderstood…but yet I felt there was nothing I could do about it. Sometimes silence is the best decision and sometimes silence speaks when words can’t.

Feeling misunderstood is the worst, but silence speaks when words can't. Click To Tweet

Be the warrior that’s inside of you.

Because she IS there and she wants to be free. She might be buried deep but I bet you’ll find her if you dig long enough. Don’t ever give up. You feel rejected I know, but the truth is, you’ve been hand-picked by the One that really matters. He’ll never reject you and He always understands! So head up girl, and pick up that sword.

Oh, and I love you- so much!

I always enjoy hearing from you! Please take a minute to say ‘hi’ and share your thoughts below. 

Also, would you do me a favor —if you resonate with this article or it has helped you today— would you share it with someone else? Maybe a friend, coworker, or family member…?

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